The Spanish Greeting Custom: How Many Kisses Do They Give in Spain?

The Spanish Greeting Custom: How Many Kisses Do They Give in Spain?
  • 20.05.2025
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The Spanish Greeting Custom: How Many Kisses Do They Give in Spain?

Spain is renowned across the globe for its vivid culture, welcoming people, passionate traditions, and, notably, for its unique way of greeting others. Among these distinctive customs, the practice of exchanging kisses on the cheek, or besos, often catches the attention and curiosity of visitors and those exploring Spanish etiquette for the first time. But how many kisses do they give in Spain? Is it the same everywhere? What does the custom signify, and how does it reflect broader aspects of Spanish society? In this comprehensive guide, we will delve into the fascinating world of the Spanish greeting kiss—unpacking its number, origins, variations, etiquette, and what it truly means in the context of modern Spain.

Table of Contents

Origins of the Spanish Cheek Kiss Greeting

To truly understand the contemporary Spanish greeting, it’s essential to travel back in time. The tradition of greeting with a kiss on the cheek is not exclusive to Spain but has roots embedded in the broader history of Mediterranean and European civilizations.

The cheek kiss, or beso en la mejilla, is often traced back to ancient Roman times. Romans, much like Greeks and other ancient people, considered physical touch to be a vital element of social interaction. Over centuries, this practice spread across Europe and evolved locally, resulting in country-specific variations. In Spain, these customs became deeply woven into everyday etiquette, evolving alongside societal changes, monarchies, religion, and cultural exchange.

The symbolism behind the kiss has always been rich: it signifies trust, friendship, equality, and respect. From the Medieval notion of sealing deals and allegiances to the affectionate family-oriented gestures of the 19th century, the custom remained robust—adapting but never fading.

Today, the beso remains an indelible thread in Spain’s social fabric. It is a product of history, shaped by tradition and community, yet alive and dynamic in the 21st century.

First Impressions: The Importance of Greetings in Spanish Culture

Spaniards are globally admired for their warmth and openness. This is especially evident in their greetings, which are considered a fundamental aspect of social interaction. Greetings in Spain are more than simple exchanges of “hello” and “goodbye”; they set the tone for relationships both personal and professional.

The initial greeting is a ritual, laden with expectations and codes. Whether meeting a friend, acquaintance, coworker, or even a stranger introduced by friends, the way you greet someone in Spain can say much about your upbringing, your attitude, and your appreciation of Spanish culture.

Starting with phrases like hola, buenos días, or ¿qué tal?, the greeting may also include a handshake, hug, or the famous kiss on the cheek. The specific approach often depends on various factors: the relationship between the people, their ages, genders, the region, and the situation at hand. Among these options, the cheek kiss stands out as one of the most emblematic and representative gestures of Spanish identity.

How Many Kisses Do the Spanish Give?

The most common number of kisses in Spain is two, exchanged one on each cheek. The usual pattern is to start with the right cheek (from the perspective of each participant), then move to the left.

To clarify, here is the standard sequence:

  1. The greeter leans to their left, aiming for the right cheek of the other person.
  2. After the first air kiss or light cheek touch, the greeter shifts to the right, giving the second kiss on the left cheek.

This double-kiss greeting is the norm in about 90% of Spain’s regions and among the vast majority of its inhabitants. However, it is important to note that these are not actual kisses planted directly on the skin; they are soft, often “air” kisses, accompanied by the gentle touch of cheeks (rather than lips). The sound of a kiss may occasionally be made, but the act remains light and non-invasive.

To summarize: Two kisses are the standard Spanish greeting.

Exceptions to the Two-Kiss Rule

Despite the overwhelming prevalence of the two-kiss greeting, there are notable exceptions, which relate mainly to regional customs, personal comfort, and influences from neighboring countries. In a few border regions, the number may be one or even three. Additionally, in extremely formal or professional settings, a handshake—or even simply a verbal greeting—can replace the kisses.

Regional Variations: A Patchwork of Customs

Spain is a tapestry of diverse cultures and traditions, each region boasting its own identity, language, and mannerisms. This diversity is also reflected in the way kisses are exchanged during greetings.

Madrid and Central Spain

In Madrid and most of central Spain, two kisses are standard, starting with the right cheek. This is the form most tourists and newcomers will encounter, especially in the nation’s capital and surrounding provinces.

Andalusia, Extremadura, Castilla-La Mancha, Castilla y León

Similarly, in Andalusia and the heartland of the country, the two-kiss rule applies universally. People of all ages and backgrounds, from large cities to rural villages, adhere to this tradition.

Catalonia, Valencia, Balearic Islands

Catalonia and the surrounding Mediterranean coast also favor the right-cheek-first, two-kiss sequence. Some individuals, particularly in Barcelona, may be slightly more reserved, given the cosmopolitan and international makeup of the city, but the tradition endures.

Galicia, Asturias, Cantabria (Northwestern Spain)

Here, too, two kisses dominate. However, some older Galicians, especially women greeting other women, may occasionally offer just one kiss, usually out of modesty or generational habit. This is, however, a rare exception, and the younger population almost always defaults to two.

Basque Country, Navarra, La Rioja

In the Basque Country, the tradition of two kisses is alive and well, though men are slightly less likely to exchange kisses with other men outside family relationships. In Navarra and La Rioja, the pattern is much the same.

Aragon, Murcia, Canary and Balearic Islands

Two kisses on the cheek constitute the norm across these regions as well. The islands, given their mix of influences from the Spanish mainland and international tourism, may display slightly more flexibility, especially around resorts and tourist areas.

Border Areas and International Influences

In areas closer to France, such as parts of Catalonia and the Basque Country, a three-kiss greeting may occasionally be observed, especially among those with French relatives or strong cross-border ties. However, this is a minority practice and generally limited to families or close-knit communities.

One-Kiss Regions

The one-cheek kiss is uncommon in Spain, though a few towns in Galicia and isolated small villages may display this habit, mainly among the older generation. For all practical purposes, visitors and newcomers should always assume the two-kiss greeting unless context clearly suggests otherwise.

When and With Whom: Navigating Contexts

The two-kiss greeting in Spain isn’t automatic. Knowing when and with whom to exchange the customary kisses is vital to respecting social norms and avoiding misunderstandings.

Family and Close Friends

Among family members, both immediate and extended, kissing on the cheek is expected and universal. This encompasses children, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. Close friends, especially those who see each other regularly, will also usually greet with two kisses, regardless of how well-acquainted they are.

Acquaintances and Social Introductions

When introduced to new people through mutual friends or in informal gatherings, it is customary to greet with two kisses—provided it involves women or mixed-gender interactions. For example, when a woman is introduced to another woman, or to a man, two kisses are customary. However, in man-to-man introductions, the default may be a handshake unless there is a sense of familiarity or the meeting is in a family context.

Workplace and Professional Settings

Professional life in Spain can be both formal and informal. In high-level or traditional corporate settings, a handshake is the norm, at least initially. However, among colleagues—especially after some rapport is established—the two-kiss greeting may spill into the office, particularly between women, or between men and women. Between men, handshakes, pats on the back, or even hugs are more common.

In less formal work environments (such as creative fields, education, or hospitality), kisses may be exchanged from the outset, particularly if a colleague is new or returning from an absence.

Festivals, Parties, and Social Events

At gatherings such as birthdays, dinners, fiestas, or weddings, the kiss greeting is almost universal. Shy or hesitant individuals may be drawn into the custom, and it serves to reinforce bonds and a sense of shared belonging.

Special Occasions: Weddings, Baptisms, Funerals

During major life events—be they happy or sad—the two-cheek kiss becomes a ritual of solidarity, love, and empathy. It is common to greet almost everyone in attendance (even those less familiar) with two kisses, reflecting shared humanity and connection.

Gender and Generational Influences

The number and nature of kisses in the Spanish greeting custom are closely linked to both gender and age.

Gender Roles in the Kiss Greeting

  • Women greeting women: Two kisses are the universal norm, regardless of the level of familiarity.
  • Women greeting men: Also two kisses, even on first introduction. This is considered a friendly, non-romantic gesture.
  • Men greeting men: This is where nuance emerges. Between close male friends or family, two kisses (sometimes accompanied by a hug or slap on the back) are common. Among mere acquaintances or in masculine-coded contexts, a handshake or a quick pat on the back is more likely.

Generational Differences

While the two-kiss custom crosses generational lines, there’s a perception that the older generation is slightly more formal. Elderly Spaniards may sometimes greet with only one kiss, or opt for a handshake or hug in certain settings. Younger Spaniards, particularly in urban areas, are comfortable with the two-cheek kiss and may even weave in other gestures, such as casual hugs with friends.

Children are taught from an early age to exchange kisses as a sign of respect and good manners—so much so that it becomes second nature by adulthood.

Spanish Kisses vs. Other Mediterranean & European Customs

The Spanish two-kiss greeting is part of a broader family of Mediterranean and European traditions, each with distinct rules:

  • France: Depending on the region, the French may exchange two, three, or even four kisses on the cheek. The sequence and starting side can vary from Paris (two) to Provence (three or four).
  • Italy: Two kisses are also common in Italy, but the start is typically on the left cheek (opposite to Spain).
  • Portugal: The Portuguese typically give two kisses, one on each cheek, but are generally more reserved in public displays of affection.
  • Netherlands, Belgium, Switzerland: Three kisses are more common in these countries, with variations in starting side and recipient gender.
  • Eastern Europe: In Russia, Serbia, and other countries, three kisses are common among close friends or family, usually exchanging “air” kisses.

For travelers, distinguishing whether the context is Spanish or French can be confusing, especially around border regions. In Spain, sticking to two kisses is almost always a safe bet.

Adapting to Change: The Impact of COVID-19

The global COVID-19 pandemic brought seismic shifts to social customs worldwide, and Spain was no exception. During 2020 and 2021, as social distancing became a necessity, traditional greetings—including the beloved cheek kiss—were drastically curtailed.

For many Spaniards, refraining from exchanging kisses felt almost unnatural, creating an emotional and cultural void. Instead, the public adapted with creative substitutes:

  • Air kisses from a distance, with no cheek contact
  • Hand waves and verbal greetings
  • Elbow bumps
  • Smiling with eyes (mask-wearing made other forms of communication critical)

Once restrictions lifted and vaccination rates soared, traditional greetings made a significant comeback. However, there remains a heightened awareness around hygiene and personal boundaries—especially with strangers or in crowded gatherings. It is now not unusual for some people, particularly the elderly or those with underlying conditions, to politely decline a kiss and instead offer a wave or nod.

The pandemic has injected a new layer of conscientiousness around greeting customs, allowing for more fluid adaptation based on individual comfort levels.

Practical Tips for Foreigners: How to Navigate the Kissing Custom

For visitors and expats, Spanish greeting etiquette can seem daunting at first, but it quickly becomes intuitive. Here are some practical guidelines for navigating the custom:

  1. Let the Spaniard Lead: If unsure, wait to see what your Spanish counterpart initiates. They will almost always move toward your right cheek, signaling the start of the two-kiss sequence.
  2. Don’t Overthink Physical Contact: You are not expected to make full cheek-to-cheek contact, nor is a loud “mwah” necessary. Lightly touch cheeks and mimic a kissing gesture in the air.
  3. Sequence: Start with your left move (their right cheek), then your right (their left cheek).
  4. Gender Matters: Two kisses are expected in any interaction involving a woman. Between men, gauge the body language; a handshake may be preferred.
  5. Be Mindful of Hygiene: If you are sick or concerned about germs, it is entirely acceptable to offer a polite apology and opt for a verbal greeting instead.
  6. Special Situations: In formal business settings or first meetings with authority figures (such as teachers, bosses, or older relatives), a handshake is safest.
  7. Don’t Force It: If a Spaniard does not initiate a kiss, don’t take offense—it may be out of respect for your possible discomfort.
  8. Adapt as Needed: In tourist-heavy zones, Spaniards may default to a handshake with foreigners, especially if they sense uncertainty.
  9. Practice Makes Perfect: After a few social gatherings, you will find yourself exchanging kisses naturally!

Remember, a well-executed greeting is more about the attitude—warmth, openness, friendliness—than about flawless technique.

Beyond the Act: The Deeper Social Meaning of the Spanish Greeting Kiss

The habitual two-cheek kiss in Spain is much more than a mechanical ritual; it is a window into the national psyche and social code.

Sign of Inclusion and Affection

In Spain, to greet someone (even a newly met person) with kisses is to acknowledge them as part of the communal in-group. This gesture breaks barriers, signals trust, and demonstrates a willingness to make others feel welcome.

Equality and Respect

The act is non-hierarchical: young and old, men and women, locals and foreigners may all receive the same greeting. It is a simple but powerful sign of mutual respect.

Contrast with Reserved Cultures

Visitors from countries where physical contact is avoided in casual contexts (such as the UK, United States, or East Asia) may find the custom surprising or even alarming. Yet for Spaniards, this physical proximity engenders stronger, more genuine relationships. The beso is the social “glue” binding society.

Influence on Communication Style

The frequency and casualness of physical greetings in Spain reinforce an open and expressive style of verbal and non-verbal communication. It is not unusual to see lively, animated gestures in conversation, reinforcing the bonds set by initial greetings.

Rituals at Beginnings and Endings

Kissing is not reserved solely for hellos; farewells also often involve the two-cheek ritual, underlining the cyclical and reciprocal nature of relationships.

What to Do in Awkward Situations

Even seasoned Spaniards occasionally find themselves in awkward greeting situations. Here’s how to handle some common scenarios:

  • Bumping Heads: If you accidentally knock heads or misalign, laugh it off—this is a shared rite of passage!
  • Going for One Kiss While the Other Goes for Two: Recover gracefully by simply following their lead, adding or subtracting as necessary.
  • Unexpected Romantic Vibe: The beso is not a sign of romantic intent. If you sense someone misinterpreted the gesture, be open about the cultural meaning.
  • Kissing Strangers: If someone you do not know well greets you with two kisses, it is a sign of inclusion, not overfamiliarity.
  • Uncomfortable with Physical Contact: In Spain, simply stating “Lo siento, prefiero no dar besos” (“Sorry, I prefer not to exchange kisses”) is accepted, particularly post-pandemic.

The Future of the Spanish Greeting Kiss

The two-cheek kiss is a Spanish hallmark, but societies and their customs are ever-evolving. New generations, increased international mobility, and recent health crises are subtly reshaping how Spaniards greet one another.

The younger, more cosmopolitan population found in cities like Madrid, Barcelona, and Valencia are increasingly comfortable mixing traditions—sometimes skipping kisses in formal or professional contexts, or blending in hugs and handshakes. The pandemic heightened awareness of health concerns and personal space, emboldening some to skip the kiss altogether or to ask before exchanging one.

Despite these subtle shifts, most sociologists and cultural observers predict that the cheek kiss will remain a core aspect of Spanish identity for generations. Its emotional and symbolic resonance is too deeply woven into the tapestry of daily life to disappear quickly. More likely, the tradition will continue adapting while staying true to its roots.

Conclusion: Embracing the Beso as Part of Spanish Life

To answer the central question—how many kisses do Spaniards give as a greeting?—the answer is nearly always two, one on each cheek. Yet, this gesture is so much more than its mechanics. It encapsulates the Spanish spirit of warmth, community, equality, and openness. Whether you’re a newcomer, a curious traveler, or an expat seeking belonging, understanding and adopting the beso is both a mark of respect and a joyous gateway into the Spanish way of life.

As times change, the core intent remains: to greet not just with words, but with sincerity, humanity, and a special touch that makes everyone feel at home, even on that very first meeting. So, next time you’re in Spain, lean in, smile, and enjoy becoming part of a centuries-old tradition—one kiss at a time.

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